Tuesday, November 01, 2005

None of the Above

Diogenes gives a multiple-choice test on Silly Liturgy. Recalling my days at the local Jesuit High School, I maintain that Diogenes did NOT allow for the obvious answer. First, his propositions:

Account A. You reason that the designated provider of the Eucharistic liturgy is your pastor, that your pastor wouldn't be in the position he is unless your bishop wanted him there, that your bishop wouldn't be your bishop unless the Pope wanted him to be. Ergo, you have the Mass the Church wants you to have. Call this the Nuremberger with Fries Approach.

Account B. You reason that, appearances notwithstanding, the liturgy as conducted by your pastor -- being at least passively ratified by your bishop -- is in actuality the Mass according to the Roman Rite, but that you yourself are too sinful to see it. Ergo, in the eyes of the saints, you have the Mass the Church wants you to have. Call this the Rex Mottram Approach.

Account C. You reason that, even though your parish Mass is not the Mass the Church says she wants you to have, she is the supreme and ultimate guarantor of your rights. Ergo, the Mass the Church wants you to have is a Mass the Church doesn't want you to have. Call this the I Guess It Was None of My Business in the First Place Sorry to Have Bothered You Approach.

The proper answer, of course, is Account D: You reason that suffering is important for salvation and that the priest and your Bishop have determined that you need to suffer more, thus they inflicted this punishment on you. Call it the Purgatory-Is-Now Approach.

No comments: