According to a report from the Centers for Disease Control released on Thursday, people with inside, compromising knowledge of Bill and Hillary Clinton’s financial and political dealings are 843% more likely to commit suicide.
Many of these suicides have been unique. Some victims were apparently run over by their own cars while in the middle of an intersection in out-of-the-way places in Arkansas. Others committed suicide with a .45 caliber hole made vertically in the very top of their heads while flying in a cargo plane. Others shot themselves, but the gun could not be found anywhere. (Some of these people had shot themselves in the back!)
'Tis a puzzlement.