The 95 Theses, Re-Worked

Well, after all, it IS the 500th of my Lut'ran friends. 

So a staunch Catholic wit decided to mash Pius X's Syllabus of Errors into only 95 sentences.  See??  He's clearly ecumenical, no??

So.  Anathema sit those who hold these heresies (inter alia, see the link):

17. Even if there is a divine revelation, it is imperfect and subject to a continual process of human understanding that corresponds to the advancement of human reason

20. Science can make progress only if the practitioner adopts an agnostic or atheist outlook concerning the nature of the material universe.

21. Christianity can be reconciled with science and material progress only to the extent it de-emphasizes dogma and adopts a spirit of reconciliation and tolerance of opposing views.

31. Human nature consists in however one defines it.

32. Human “values” can be changed according to the desires of human beings.

33. Even if human beings have an intrinsic nature, it is not in any case endowed by God.

48. There is no such thing as natural law; it is not a feature of the world and has nothing to do with the constitution of the human person.

49. There is no such thing as absolute moral norms that prohibit intrinsically evil acts and that are binding without exception.

50. There is no objective moral truth; moral truths are whatever society says they are.

51. Moral truths are nothing other than the values inculcated in us by society so that humans can cooperate with each other.

56. Every culture has value and should be judged by its own standards, and to pass moral judgment on another culture is nothing other than imposition.

57. Adult humans everywhere are free to do whatever they want as long as their actions do not infringe upon what others want to do.

58. The purpose of society is to encourage and to protect the “right” of its members to be whatever they choose to be, however they define that.

59. It is the function of society alone, through the agency of the state, to define what infringes on the freedom of others.

75. The state is fully competent to determine the curriculum for the education of the youth.

76. Education deals with ideas, and since ideas contradict each other, the purpose of education is to understand the intrinsic nature of ideas, which means that a “liberal” education is one that frees us from any objective claim to truth.

77. “Relevance” is the primary criterion for an educational curriculum.

81. The purpose of government is to protect individual rights, which in turn are what the state says and enforces.

82. A citizen has the right to do whatever he or she wills provided that no one is directly hurt by the action.

83. Every human being has a “right” not merely to pursue happiness, but to be happy, and that it is the function of the state to guarantee and bring this right to its completion.

84. Either the state or society may determine the nature of what constitutes a “family”.

95. The moral and ethical teachings of the Judeo-Christian tradition are one thing and public policy is another, and in instances of conflict between the two, religious groups ought to accommodate the will of the majority as expressed in public policy.

There ya go!